Thursday, March 24, 2011

Where Are Those Cement Shoes?

The parking services dudes at UVU are notoriously angry and they give tickets for breathing in the wrong parking stall if you're not careful. I am, therefore, always suspicious when I've parked illegally and managed to get away without a ticket.

Yesterday. I was running late for Practicum cause I had to get gas on the way. I parked in a faculty parking space in the lot south of the annex. When class was over 25 minutes later, I approached my vehicle cautiously. There was no yellow paper on the window- a good sign (my brother has an unpaid ticket from before this car was mine). There was no strip of white paper under the windshield wiper. I was safe? So I climbed in my car, put the keys in the ignition and hesitated... WHAT IF.

And, really, these thoughts went through my head in a mostly serious way.

WHAT IF the parking services, tired of people getting away with the parking equivalent of murder, upgraded from BOOTS


They certainly wouldn't leave a nasty note on the window telling you that your car would blow up if you turned the key. They'd do it mob style.

They didn't catch me in the annex parking lot, or even at the library an hour later. But I'm on to you, parking service mob dudes. I am hiring someone to start my car for me starting the next time I don't have the right sticker in my window.

Everyone else, don't be surprised if you see something like this on the news:

You've been warned.

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