Man, Lord sure does know His stuff. Today I skipped out on singing for another ward (though I listened in on the talks), taught the Relief Society lesson, and held choir practice right after Sacrament Meeting. It was a TON of stuff to juggle,and I nearly gave up on it. My trust in the Lord somehow overruled my anxiety, though, and I am so grateful. I am miles away from yesterday, and I never want to go back. Certainty and peace and love flooded through me at every turn. I can't contain my joy!
The bishop gave me three tickets to conference. I'm taking Shell and my dad. I've never been to a general session, so I am super excited! We'll be sitting where our nosebleeds will get nosebleeds, but it doesn't matter because we'll be THERE!
I couldn't express my gratitude for today it I had all the time in the world. It's like my heart has been zapped back to life, like all of the color and sound have returned to the world. I don't know what tomorrow will be like (I am performing a scene and I'm not memorized yet), and to be perfectly honest, I'm afraid of feeling miserable as I have been for the last few weeks. But in my ever-changing world of influences and decisions, the one sure thing on which I can always depend is the Gospel. I've heard it said a million times, and I'll say it a million more because right now I can't be sure of anything. Last night, however, when I opened my scriptures, though the words meant nothing to my angry and impatient mind, an undeniable confidence in its truthfulness reverberated through me. Every minute of every meeting today was filled with that same indescribable, palpable happiness. Whatever I do, however I feel, I will always know this church is true.
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Recorded 3/28/10
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